Goats do Roam Rosé 2007

Do goats roam? Yes. Goats do roam. Glad we cleared that up.

We ordered this South African rosé from Wine.com. I badly wanted to review a rosé and, since the tint of this wine is nearly identical to kiwi-strawberry Snapple, I became quite excited upon seeing it. Kiwi-strawberry Snapple is, quite simply, one of the most delicious drinks modern science has ever concocted. It is also a drink I have sorely missed since the first moment I decided I care too much about my health to pollute my system with sugary crap like kiwi-strawberry Snapple. So while I will never again drink a kiwi-strawberry Snapple, I would give my liver, pancreas, and quite a few brain cells if I were to find a wine with its sweet, delicious taste. Could it be that I have found kiwi-strawberry Snapple's alcoholic cousin, a wine sweet and fruity and Snapplesque?

Um, no.

In fact, I will now transcribe, verbatim, my thoughts for the last half-hour.

"Mmm . . . Snapple. Sweeeeeet. [sip] D'oh! Mmm . . . Snapple. Sweeeeet. [sip] D'oh! Mmm . . . Snapple. Sweeeeeet. [sip] D'oh!"

And so on.

One curiosity about Goats do Roam is the faith they have in goats. They brag, quite openly, that the grapes for this particular wine were chosen by a flock set loose to roam the vineyard. Am I the only one who finds that a little crazy? Do I want my grapes picked by goats, or people? Do goats even pick grapes? Don't they eat them? How do they make wine from goat-eaten grapes? I shudder to think.

Anyway, it's a decent rosé. I give it a 6 out of 10, even if it is nothing like kiwi-strawberry Snapple. It's dry, gentle, and goes down easy. Not bad. Not too exciting.

6 out of 10.

Wine.com, $7.99